I'M SORRY

Okay, so I haven't blogged in such a long time I'm really sorry!

I've just been busy, you know? School, march break, etc.

OKAY so I went to Ottawa for march break this year, and omg it was so much fun. I wish I never came back home, as bad as that sounds but it was just so much fun. Alright I'm done.

Ahhh I miss you guys, how has everyone been?
This is such a shitty blog but I thought I'd let the 4 people know that I'm alive and shit.

BUT YEAH HOW ARE YOU? :)

5 favourite things.

I've just decided to compose a list of my 5 favourite things that I'm really digging right now. It's nothing big, just what is on my mind..or what hasn't left in a while.

1. Cute, short videos.


2. Long, sad books.

I love books that just make me think and get me sad haha. If you haven't already clued in I'm into the sad stuff, ha. For example, I really like this excerpt from this book by Ellen Hopkins, called Burned. 

Did You Ever
When you were little, endure
your parents’ warnings, then wait
for them to leave the room,
pry loose protective covers
and consider inserting some metal
object into an electrical outlet?
Did you wonder if for once
you might light up the room?
When you were big enough
to cross the street on your own,
did you ever wait for a signal,
hear the frenzied approach
of a fire truck and feel like
stepping out in front of it?
Did you wonder just how far
that rocket ride might take you?
When you were almost grown,
did you ever sit in a bubble bath,
perspiration pooling,
notice a blow dryer plugged
in within easy reach, and think
about dropping it into the water?
Did you wonder if the expected
rush might somehow fail you?
And now, do you ever dangle
your toes over the precipice,
dare the cliff to crumble,
defy the frozen deity to suffer
the sun, thaw feather and bone,
take wing to fly you home?
I, Pattyn Scarlet Von Stratten, do.


3. Nerds. Boys with glasses. Scruff.




4. Lace, and matching.




5. Chocolate covered anything. 

 IT IS SO GOOD. NEED I SAY MOAR?  

What do you like?

Night night, 

-S. 

ps. Has anyone else thought it was weird that I sign off with "S." when my name is like right there on the right? Just sayin'

girl, interrupted.

So I had watched the movie "Girl, Interrupted" today. This movie stars Winona Ryder, Angelina Jolie, Brittany Murphy, Clea DuVall, Jared Leto, Whoopi Goldberg and a few other actors that I don't feel like naming off. This movie was based off of the novel by Susanna Kaysen and her journey through living in a mental institute for 18 months.

It was a pretty fucked up movie, and that's why I loved it. I think it really demonstrated how sometimes you just never know what's going on in your head. It also kinda got me wondering about perception and how people view or understand one another. To Susanna, she didn't think she was crazy, and neither did a few of the other nurses working in the ward, but according to the psychiatrists she had some borderline psycho-neurotic problem and made her do such things.

I actually think it's really weird talking about this movie. I dunno. It's like this little bit of me was kind of exposed in this movie. As I was watching it I couldn't help but think "that's exactly how I feel."
 I often feel like I'm kept in this box, and I can see all of my surroundings, and I want to reach and touch and feel and smile and laugh, but I can't. I'm not able to get out, nor am I able to tell someone to let me out. Although I hate this feeling, and I've mentioned it before here, I can never rid it. I'm just playing games with my mind to keep myself occupied.

Like Susanna, I'm ambivalent.

I'm torn between wanting to stop these feelings, and between accepting them as my alibi. My other half, my excuse, that I can just turn to when I feel the need to submerge in empty thoughts and chasms of sadness. 

Have you seen the movie? What did you think of it? I highly recommend it if you haven't.

sleep tight,
-S.

stuff

So basically, everyone should try these lovely colours/styles at least once this year.
Be bold! Try something different! No harm in that, right?

Nanette Lepore with the everyday eyeliner rimmed inner eye, but I really like how instead of a nude lipstick, it's a little bit of a darker hue of rose. Purple is really seeming to show up a lot lately.

Mulberry with the crazy teased hair. Hairspray and a comb and you're friggin set. Obviously darker eyeshadow and fake lashes are a must with hair this big.

 

Madewell with a berry cheek and lip stain, and wavy hair. Not excessive and looks natural. 

ALSO, Molly Girard Coonan and partner Alice Barlow celebrated the launched of Barlow in New York. Blake Lively is sporting a beautiful lace skirt from Barlow. I want it sooo bad:

 

 

Molly Coonan and Alice Barlow

You can visit Barlow right here.

To be honest there isn't much to say here. This week was lame, I had a chemistry test today and got my math test back. I am not pleased with where I'm at.
People say that in 25 years, I'll be totally out of Canada and in Europe or New York, doing my own thing. I really hope so, that seems like a fun experience, I'd be at an exceptional state of mind.

Where do you see yourself in 25 years?

Untitled

Time is running out
tick

tick

tick

Can't finish what I've started

Stop doing what I've wanted
tock

tock

tock

A sleepless sleep
a slow motion dream

Time beats away on the longest day
I wanna break away on the longest day